Last October I finished the first draft of my YA paranormal fantasy, Caribou Canyon. I'm sad to say that it took about two years to write. There are three reasons for this. The first is that there were several breaks in there for major things like surgery and moves and other life events. The other reason was that it was a pretty polished first draft so I took a lot of time going over each chapter. The final reason is that I did no outline (I don't outline first drafts and I stand firmly by this decision to fly by the seat of my flower-print skirts) so it turned out to be 250k words long. Yeah, you read that right. And that's with the ending summarized, so in actuality it should've been more like 260k.
I put it down for awhile, since this is apparently a thing one is supposed to do. I've recently considered serializing it, which I'm sure everyone already knows because you are all loyal and faithful readers. I've started reading it and making notes. My hope was that I'd be able to shorten it. I remember having several ideas of ways to shorten it. One of my friends from writer's group said that the longer it got the more likely it would be that I would be able to chop stuff off of the beginning.
Well, after reading the first three chapters here are what some of my notes look like:
• There needs to be something in between these two chapters
• It sounds like I'm skipping ahead
• I need a scene through this character's POV
• I need to write this out instead of summarize it
I've decided this is not my fault. Sure, it's my story, but it's not my fault it keeps getting bigger and bigger. You see, it's a paranormal story so there's an element of the paranormal at work here. This morning I suddenly found myself reminded of my childhood, when my parents were going through a divorce. My dad wanted to be the cool dad, so he let my sister and I watch every god awful horror movie ever made.
There's one called "The Blob". I'm thinking of the one from 1988. Yeah. It's actually a remake of a movie from the '50s. Imagine my shock. "The Blob" is a really awful (though scary when you're around 9) movie about this giant blob of red stuff that just keeps getting bigger and bigger and consuming everything and anything in its path, including people. The more people it devours, the bigger it gets.
My story is like the blob. I feed it words and the words multiply. It just keeps getting bigger and bigger all by itself. There's no stopping it. I've created a monster. A wonderful, awesome monster, but a monster all the same.
That's my excuse and I'm sticking to it. Crazy word counts are not my fault. Nope.
So, while I've only read 3 of the 115 chapters I'm not sure if the serial format will work. I'm going to finish reading and taking notes and then make an outline (I'm not opposed to outlines for later drafts) and then decide. Since I'm thinking of new ideas I might find a way to break it up into 2 or 3 novels which would be a novel concept, in which case "The Blob" phenomenon is quite welcome.
Or maybe it's "The Gremlins"? You feed it after midnight and then it multiplies? Hmmm . . .
Monday, March 28, 2016
Tuesday, March 15, 2016
Semicolons on Saturdays and em dashes on Fridays
When I first started writing fiction I was pretty frightened of punctuation, other than the standards: periods, apostrophes, question marks, and quotation marks. So those were pretty much the only things I used, other than commas (which I did not use correctly). After a few months of writing I realized I could not go on the way I was. My prose was dull and empty. My nights were cold and lonely. So I took the plunge and started to look up the rules. I started with the semicolon.
I admit, I was always curious about the semicolon, but I was also afraid of her. She felt like an upperclass citizen. She was a country club girl and I was from the wrong side of the tracks. I didn't understand her and I was certain she would never understand me. But I just couldn't stop thinking about that beautiful little comma with the period above it. So I got to know her a bit. I tried her out a few times. I realized that she understood my writing in ways the comma never had, so I started to use her more and more.
I'm ashamed to admit, but I started to overuse her, abuse her even. I didn't realize it at the time, but I made her do things she shouldn't have done. She was connecting clauses that weren't related closely enough to warrant being connected. I used her when I should've used a period instead. Sometimes she was in a paragraph multiple times and in three or four consecutive sentences. The poor little thing was probably exhausted. I didn't realize what I was doing until I put my manuscript down for a while and looked at it later. I was like, "Wow, this looks horrible!" Unfortunately, my solution was to pull away from the relationship. I used her and threw her away. My later drafts have very few semicolons. This is not okay either.
After my wild fling with the semicolon I pretty much went back to the standard periods, commas, and question marks. Bor-ing. Again, I realized I needed to mix it up some more. I needed to put semicolons back into my writing, but moderately. I also needed to use ellipses and em dashes, both of which scared me even more than the semicolon once did. I've noticed that a lot of new writers make up their own rules for ellipses, so I was afraid I'd do that too. As far as the em dash goes, I only recently realized that it's a real piece of punctuation. I would see people use it and think, "Is that even allowable?"
I looked up the rules of the ellipsis, and I think for the most part I'm using it correctly. Shocker, right? I'm sure my usage isn't perfect yet, but I plan to do a full edit solely for grammar when I'm satisfied with the content of my manuscript.
I looked up the rules of the em dash, and unfortunately I did much the same thing that I did with the semicolon. I got really excited about the em dash and I began to overuse her. Not only was I overusing the em dash, but I was only using her correctly about 60% of the time. Poor em dash. I didn't mean to make her do things she wasn't meant to do. I discovered this when I gave my draft to my writer's group. I'm pretty sure my friend Elly was on the verge of ripping her hair out (or possibly mine). Another member of the group pointed out that I wasn't using nearly enough commas. That is a result of a years old fling with commas, where I of course used them and abused them and later threw them away.
The lesson here is that when it comes to punctuation, I am a player. But I've seen the error of my ways. It's time to learn the rules and give the correct amount of attention to all the pieces of punctuation for the betterment of my writing and for the sanity of my friends.
So while I am working on what will be the real and absolute for certain (I swear) final draft of my vampire novel I am reading many, many grammar books. I don't expect to memorize every rule there is, but I think I will absorb some things along the way so that when it comes time to do my grammar edit I can just use the books as references. And who knows? Maybe one day I will have the rules down pat so I can break them for the sake of metaphor. I love breaking rules.
I admit, I was always curious about the semicolon, but I was also afraid of her. She felt like an upperclass citizen. She was a country club girl and I was from the wrong side of the tracks. I didn't understand her and I was certain she would never understand me. But I just couldn't stop thinking about that beautiful little comma with the period above it. So I got to know her a bit. I tried her out a few times. I realized that she understood my writing in ways the comma never had, so I started to use her more and more.
I'm ashamed to admit, but I started to overuse her, abuse her even. I didn't realize it at the time, but I made her do things she shouldn't have done. She was connecting clauses that weren't related closely enough to warrant being connected. I used her when I should've used a period instead. Sometimes she was in a paragraph multiple times and in three or four consecutive sentences. The poor little thing was probably exhausted. I didn't realize what I was doing until I put my manuscript down for a while and looked at it later. I was like, "Wow, this looks horrible!" Unfortunately, my solution was to pull away from the relationship. I used her and threw her away. My later drafts have very few semicolons. This is not okay either.
After my wild fling with the semicolon I pretty much went back to the standard periods, commas, and question marks. Bor-ing. Again, I realized I needed to mix it up some more. I needed to put semicolons back into my writing, but moderately. I also needed to use ellipses and em dashes, both of which scared me even more than the semicolon once did. I've noticed that a lot of new writers make up their own rules for ellipses, so I was afraid I'd do that too. As far as the em dash goes, I only recently realized that it's a real piece of punctuation. I would see people use it and think, "Is that even allowable?"
I looked up the rules of the ellipsis, and I think for the most part I'm using it correctly. Shocker, right? I'm sure my usage isn't perfect yet, but I plan to do a full edit solely for grammar when I'm satisfied with the content of my manuscript.
I looked up the rules of the em dash, and unfortunately I did much the same thing that I did with the semicolon. I got really excited about the em dash and I began to overuse her. Not only was I overusing the em dash, but I was only using her correctly about 60% of the time. Poor em dash. I didn't mean to make her do things she wasn't meant to do. I discovered this when I gave my draft to my writer's group. I'm pretty sure my friend Elly was on the verge of ripping her hair out (or possibly mine). Another member of the group pointed out that I wasn't using nearly enough commas. That is a result of a years old fling with commas, where I of course used them and abused them and later threw them away.
The lesson here is that when it comes to punctuation, I am a player. But I've seen the error of my ways. It's time to learn the rules and give the correct amount of attention to all the pieces of punctuation for the betterment of my writing and for the sanity of my friends.
So while I am working on what will be the real and absolute for certain (I swear) final draft of my vampire novel I am reading many, many grammar books. I don't expect to memorize every rule there is, but I think I will absorb some things along the way so that when it comes time to do my grammar edit I can just use the books as references. And who knows? Maybe one day I will have the rules down pat so I can break them for the sake of metaphor. I love breaking rules.
Wednesday, March 2, 2016
I just remembered that I have a blog!
Okay, so I didn't actually forget about it. That would be really bad, but I did put it on the back burner due to many stressful things. Actually, I think I might be experiencing blog block, which to tell you the truth is kind of a fun type of writer's block, only because the name is catchy. Blog block. But other than the catchy name, it's just as annoying as any other kind of writer's block and I'd rather not have blog block because I like my blog and don't want to neglect it. I'm going to try to cure my blog block (I just can't get enough of writing that) by talking about some of the things (though it really might be just one big thing) causing my blog block (blog block blog block blog block).
At least I can say that my poor neglected blog has not been neglected for lack of ideas. I have a list on my iPad of blog ideas that has about twenty topics on it. Every time an idea comes to me I run and write it down. Some of those ideas have been on that list for months. Ironically, when it's time to write a post, I don't usually sit down and look at that list. Usually what happens is inspiration about something totally random strikes and I sit down and write about it.
So, ideas are not a problem.
Pain is a problem. Stress is a problem. Stress and pain. Stress over pain, and stress over dealing with things involving pain. If you've been following my blog (thank you, loyal readers) then you're somewhat aware of these issues, but I don't really mention them that much. This is not an oversight. It sucks to talk about it. I'm in pain 24 hours a day and that sucks. Talking about it makes it real and it makes me vulnerable and nobody wants bad things to be real and nobody wants to be vulnerable.
My minor ankle sprain in July, 2014 wound up needing two surgeries. I developed chronic pain and chronic nerve pain (who knew nerves could hurt?) that probably resulted from compression after the second surgery (happens to about 5% of people) which may or may not be a specific type of chronic pain called Chronic Regional Pain Syndrome which is apparently worse than regular chronic pain. Whether it is or isn't CRPS, it sucks. It spread from my tiny little ankle down to my entire foot and up my leg to knee. It all has to do with the brain and spinal cord and nerves and connections (that's about as scientific as I can get). The pain's moving around so much that I'm running out of comfortable positions to lie in.
That's just a summary.
Luckily my blog block hasn't stretched to my fiction writing. I'm still able to do that, though all my doctor appointments and being in pain are putting a damper on the amount of time/spoons (energy) I have. I think maybe it's harder to blog than write fiction because to me it feels more like actual work. Not that fiction writing isn't extremely difficult and energy draining, but it's fun world building. Whereas with blogging I feel like I need to be a lot more coherent and fully in the moment. Or something. I don't know. Well, hopefully this little post will get me going again.
Bye bye, blog block.
Saturday, February 13, 2016
Real, actual cures for writer's block (I swear)
If you're a writer then at least once in your life you've experienced that dreaded moment when the words just will not flow no matter what you do.
The ideas are in your head. You've waited all day to write. You sit down in front of your computer, or you have your notebook and 1.6 mm pen (their ink is so squishy) and suddenly you can't do it. Maybe you're nervous you won't get it right. Maybe it's an emotional scene that's hard for you to write. Maybe there's a bunch of crap going on in your life that is somehow preventing you from working on your favorite hobby or life's dream (stupid life crap--as if it isn't crappy enough as it is). Maybe you're too physically and mentally exhausted from your day job and family/friend duties to have the mental energy to write (writing is kind of paradoxical that way--it's fun and relaxing, but also takes mental energy). Or maybe there's just no logical reason at all.
You just can't get the words out.
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https://www.gofundme.com/help-this-amazing-writer?member=51762
If you're lucky, this only happens every now and then and only lasts for maybe a day or two. Sometimes it's scene specific. Other times it's life event specific. Other times there's no rhyme or reason.
If the block plagues you long enough you probably start to feel a great gaping hole open up inside you. You miss writing. You've had it with people and their well-meaning suggestions for how to fix it. You're probably sick to death of the phrase "writer's block." You probably didn't want to read my post just because of the title. You've probably read every freaking article, blog post, book, paragraph, tweet, and piece of graffiti on a wall in an alley behind a Chinese restaurant ever written on the subject. You're probably sick to the death of the very word "block" and anything that remotely resembles a block. If you have children, grandchildren, nieces or nephews, or friends with children and they want to play with blocks you want to throw their blocks into the fireplace. Don't do this--the child might cry, and then you will be so guilt-ridden that your writer's block is guaranteed to go on for at least an extra month.
Don't worry. I'm not going to subject you to the standard solutions that you've all probably heard a million times. You know: write something different, stop trying so hard, outline, talk it out with a friend, take a walk, just sit down and write whatever comes to your mind, and blah blah blah. Nope. Not going to tell you these. Now I know you might be thinking: didn't you just tell us? No, I didn't. Honest. It just looks like I did.
All right. Here are my new and fresh ideas:
1.) Go over to Spotify or Apple Music or whatever music subscription you use. Pandora (though I love it) won't work for this one. If you don't have a subscription, get a free trial, just don't forget to discontinue it before it runs out (gets me every darn time). Now do a search for "O Fortuna." Yep, you'll get a crap load of results. At least fifty, I think. Now, you'll have to sift through and figure out which are actual remixes and which are just the same version played by different symphonies. It's cool--it will kill a bunch of time and take your mind off the fact that you're supposed to be writing. Now once you've done that put all the ones that are actual different versions in a play list. And yes--now you are going to listen to them.
Yes. Each. And. Every. One. Of. Them.
Rate them. And yes--I actually did this. Some of you might remember me tweeting about it.
Okay, so I'm only being half-truthful. I made it through about 20 of them, and I only rated them in my head. There's an interesting heavy metal/rap-ish one (though I never really got the whole heavy metal/rap combo thing), and a cool techno version.
Pretty soon you may also be able to do this with the Game of Thrones theme song. I don't know what it's called, but I've started to hear lots of different remixes played at hockey games. At first I thought it didn't really go, but then I remembered how violent hockey is.
2.) If you have a Wii, make a Mii for each of your characters. Yeah, I know it's cheesy and dorky, but so what? And yes--I've done this. Though not for all my characters. Yet. This is also a good cure for insomnia.
An alternative to this is going through magazines or random pics on the net and finding ones that best fit your character.
3.) Go "window shopping" online for your characters' clothes. In my YA novel my characters go to the Homecoming Dance, (because you can't have a YA without Homecoming--unless it's dystopian or AU) so I found pictures of each of their outfits. Yes, I did. I even found suits for the boys. You want to make something of it? It killed so much actual writing time. But when I was done I did lots of writing. I swear.
4.) Write a blog post about ridiculous ways to cure writer's block.
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Addition: if you like my style, you should totally check out the Go Fund Me my wonderful friend set up for me, because they love me and know writing is my everything.
https://www.gofundme.com/help-this-amazing-writer?member=51762
Wednesday, February 10, 2016
Yes, we're still talking about racism
And we're going to keep talking about it, because unlike some wrinkly white dudes would have us believe, racism has not been solved. (And oh yeah, by the way, global warming is a thing.) Actually, I would argue that despite the amazing progress we've made that in some ways racism is almost an even bigger problem today. I think that unfortunately the progress we've made can make people, even well meaning people, ignorant to the problems black people still face. Gains are made, and people start to relax a little and forget (white people who have the privilege to do so, anyway) that there is so much more work that still needs to be done. And that's when some wrinkly white guy opens up his big mouth and says, "Why are we still talking about racism?"
Because racism is still a problem.
All right, I went off on a bit of a tangent there. So I'm talking about the Super Bowl, though not any of the actual football stuff. Unless you've been living under a rock you've probably heard at least a little something about Beyonce's wonderful awesome halftime show (getting an idea of my opinion on it?) So, I'm not a reporter, and I'm not writing this to give a detailed recap on what happened. So, quick summary: she used her new song "Formation," her video and her performance, to send an important message that needs to be heard about racism, police brutality, black women and black hair and black people being black, Ferguson, hurricane Katrina and I think some other things too. I actually didn't watch the halftime show. But just reading about it later gave me chills.
I think what she did is awesome. Black people still do not have enough of a voice. They aren't being heard. Beyonce is a black woman with a voice who was given a huge platform and she took that opportunity. Hell yes. Power to her. She was given use of one of the most watched nights of the year and she used it for more than just cheap entertainment. It was brilliant. It got people talking. A lot people weren't happy. So what? It needed to be said. People didn't want their night of watching sweaty men potentially giving each other life changing concussions and other injuries for the purposes of making rich people richer ruined by important issues. Boohoo.
Of course, she's getting a lot of backlash. Because people still just don't get it. I don't understand how people still don't get it. It's so frustrating. That's what makes me sad about the whole thing. People think she's lashing out against cops and white people and that's not what it's about. She's standing up for herself and for black people. Her message wasn't heard by everyone. And because her message still wasn't heard we are still going to be talking about racism.
And while we're talking about the Super Bowl, let's talk about Cam Newton for a minute. Has anyone heard about how terribly unsportsmanlike it was of him to give such short answers during the post game interview, and then to just walk off? Have you all heard about what a sore loser he is? Yeah, you may have heard that a few hundred times.
First of all, I think it's pretty crappy to make the losing team give an interview so soon after losing. I mean, come on. Seriously? Are we really kicking them when they're down? Oh yeah, it's the media. Of course we are. Come on, nobody likes to lose. I was up for a promotion at work once. When I didn't get it, I was so upset that I called in sick the next day. I'm not proud of it, but there you go. There was even talk about Newton not being deserving of MVP. Come on. Give the guy a break.
Second of all, immediately after the game, on the field, Newton shook Manning's hand and congratulated him. I saw it live. I later caught a still shot of it and saw that Newton had a genuine smile on his face.
It should also be mentioned that at the same time that Newton was being interviewed, Denver cornerback Chris Harris was in the same room, separated only by a curtain, talking about the game. So, it's no wonder he was upset.
Further more, when the Indianapolis Colts lost Super Bowl XLIV to the New Orleans Saints, Peyton Manning went straight to the locker room without shaking hands with Drew Brees or Sean Payton. While he was criticized for this, he wasn't given nearly the same amount of crap about it that Cam Newton is being given. At least Cam Newton tried to do all that was expected of him. He was upset. He lost the Super Bowl. Come on, people. Give. The. Guy. A. Break.
Oh, and in case the point I was trying to make wasn't crystal clear, I'll just spell it out. Cam Newton is black. Peyton Manning is white.
Yep. We're still talking about racism.
I really hope that one day we can stop.
Because racism is still a problem.
All right, I went off on a bit of a tangent there. So I'm talking about the Super Bowl, though not any of the actual football stuff. Unless you've been living under a rock you've probably heard at least a little something about Beyonce's wonderful awesome halftime show (getting an idea of my opinion on it?) So, I'm not a reporter, and I'm not writing this to give a detailed recap on what happened. So, quick summary: she used her new song "Formation," her video and her performance, to send an important message that needs to be heard about racism, police brutality, black women and black hair and black people being black, Ferguson, hurricane Katrina and I think some other things too. I actually didn't watch the halftime show. But just reading about it later gave me chills.
I think what she did is awesome. Black people still do not have enough of a voice. They aren't being heard. Beyonce is a black woman with a voice who was given a huge platform and she took that opportunity. Hell yes. Power to her. She was given use of one of the most watched nights of the year and she used it for more than just cheap entertainment. It was brilliant. It got people talking. A lot people weren't happy. So what? It needed to be said. People didn't want their night of watching sweaty men potentially giving each other life changing concussions and other injuries for the purposes of making rich people richer ruined by important issues. Boohoo.
Of course, she's getting a lot of backlash. Because people still just don't get it. I don't understand how people still don't get it. It's so frustrating. That's what makes me sad about the whole thing. People think she's lashing out against cops and white people and that's not what it's about. She's standing up for herself and for black people. Her message wasn't heard by everyone. And because her message still wasn't heard we are still going to be talking about racism.
And while we're talking about the Super Bowl, let's talk about Cam Newton for a minute. Has anyone heard about how terribly unsportsmanlike it was of him to give such short answers during the post game interview, and then to just walk off? Have you all heard about what a sore loser he is? Yeah, you may have heard that a few hundred times.
First of all, I think it's pretty crappy to make the losing team give an interview so soon after losing. I mean, come on. Seriously? Are we really kicking them when they're down? Oh yeah, it's the media. Of course we are. Come on, nobody likes to lose. I was up for a promotion at work once. When I didn't get it, I was so upset that I called in sick the next day. I'm not proud of it, but there you go. There was even talk about Newton not being deserving of MVP. Come on. Give the guy a break.
Second of all, immediately after the game, on the field, Newton shook Manning's hand and congratulated him. I saw it live. I later caught a still shot of it and saw that Newton had a genuine smile on his face.
It should also be mentioned that at the same time that Newton was being interviewed, Denver cornerback Chris Harris was in the same room, separated only by a curtain, talking about the game. So, it's no wonder he was upset.
Further more, when the Indianapolis Colts lost Super Bowl XLIV to the New Orleans Saints, Peyton Manning went straight to the locker room without shaking hands with Drew Brees or Sean Payton. While he was criticized for this, he wasn't given nearly the same amount of crap about it that Cam Newton is being given. At least Cam Newton tried to do all that was expected of him. He was upset. He lost the Super Bowl. Come on, people. Give. The. Guy. A. Break.
Oh, and in case the point I was trying to make wasn't crystal clear, I'll just spell it out. Cam Newton is black. Peyton Manning is white.
Yep. We're still talking about racism.
I really hope that one day we can stop.
Sunday, February 7, 2016
Swimming in Cucumber Water (Not Gatorade) Accomplishments Rather Than Drowning in Tears of Defeat
If you know me personally or have been following my blog than you know I've submitted my first novel to agents and publisher around thirty times and received around the same number of rejections. Let me just say--if I hadn't said it before, that's rough. Being told--whether it be through a form rejection, a personal email, or simply no response, that you aren't good enough (because regardless of the actual reason, that is what a rejection feels like) is hard. Being told this once is hard. Being told 30 times? Really freaking hard.
There were tears. There was yelling. There was irrational cussing and bashing of the publishing industry (none of which I actually meant, which is why I did it in the privacy of my home and not on the internet. I just needed to vent. Please, please, if you are upset over a rejection, call up a friend and vent. DO NOT get on twitter and bash the agent or traditional publishing. If you do, you're pretty much screwed.) There were pep talks. There was beer. There was wine. There was ice cream. There was chocolate. I think there may have even been chocolate wine. There were realizations: I need to make my query letter better and my book better.
I know that before any of my books get published my number of rejections will be far above 30. That number may even be in the three digits. I now know that this is quite normal for many writers. That's okay. I can handle it. Because being published is what I what more than anything (at least career-wise).
This morning I was thinking: if there's anyone out there other than fellow writers who understand rejection, it's athletes.
I tricked you guys, didn't I?
This post is not about surviving rejection from agents and publishers. It's about . . . wait for it . . .
. . . wait for it . . .
Football.
No! No, please! Loyal readers, don't go away! I'm sorry I tricked you! But it's Super Bowl Sunday! Come on! You had to at least have had some idea! The word gatorade is in the title! If you've ever caught a glimpse of a championship game you have to know about the gatorade! Please keep reading. I promise the above preamble wasn't 100% a trick. It's relevant to the post.
In actuality this isn't about football. While I am a fan, and do know a fair amount about the game, I don't feel that I know enough to write a post about statistics and strategy and all that. This post is about winning and losing and the vast difference with which players are treated on a weekly basis based on how well they're doing or not doing.
As a Colorado native I'm a pretty big Bronco fan. My nails are currently painted orange, blue, and white. I'm very excited that the Broncos are in the big game. My boyfriend is from--well, for simplicity's sake we'll say he's from Indiana, so while he's a Colts fan he is also a Peyton Manning fan. So, happily, we are rooting for the same team today. He said the other day, "I would love to see Peyton Manning win and go out in a blaze of glory." My stepdad (also a Bronco fan) said, "I would love for the Broncos to win, Manning to get a ring, and retire." I'm sure that many Broncos fans, and probably many Colts fans, have made similar statements.
The other day I said to my boyfriend, "Well, even if the Broncos lose, why shouldn't Manning get to go out in a blaze of glory?" The team made it to the Super Bowl for crying out loud. That's a huge accomplishment, especially considering the fact that the Broncos as a team, and Peyton Manning himself have had a freaking roller coaster of a season.
Let's talk about that roller coaster of a season. This is where the rejection I talked about earlier comes into this. For Peyton Manning and the Broncos, last season's playoffs didn't go so well. One and done. At that point, media and fans (egged on by the media) were going on and on about how Manning was old, he was done, he didn't have it anymore, he should retire, the team should put in Brock Osweiler, etc. etc. etc. Despite the fact that it had come out that Manning was injured during that game, the media didn't shut up about how he was too old to keep playing.
I was angry, to say the least. Now, as a fan, I of course want the team to win. But, I'm also a psychology student. Well, I have a Bachelor's degree and am not currently in school, but still consider myself a student because I love to keep learning stuff on my own. So, the psychology of sports fascinates me. There are so many different factors other than athleticism and how good the opponents are that can affect players: a previous win or loss, home field vs. away game, fan attitude, media attention, various things going on in a player's life, etc.
Other than a writer, a sports fan, and a psych student, guess what else I am? I'm a human being. Shocker, right? Well, I have another shocker. You guys might want to sit down for this. It's going to be tough to swallow.
Are you sitting?
If you have a friend or family member nearby, you might want to take their hand. I'm serious. This is going to be really hard. Maybe grab a stuffed animal or something.
Okay, are you guys ready?
Do you know who else is human?
Athletes.
I know, right? They're human beings. They have feelings. They have lives outside of the sports they play. Weird, right? They have families, friends, hobbies, and interests other than sports. They are affected (whether they admit it or not) by the media (maybe some more than others). Even the greats like Peyton Manning, Cam Newton, Tom Brady, and all the other greats whose names I don't feel like listing are human beings. I sometimes get the impression that fans forget this and think that guys like Tom Brady are robots who were built to play great football and do nothing else. (Although, I recently heard that Tom Brady has never in his life tried coffee, so that does call into question whether or not he is actually human.)
So, even when it was announced that Manning would be playing with the Broncos for the 2015 season, not all of the fans were happy. As a fan, I was angry with the media and my fellow Broncos' fans. I support the team, no matter who is playing. If it's Manning, okay. Go, Peyton! If it's Osweiler, okay. Go, Brock! It it's that third string guy whose name I don't know, okay. Go, guy! (Hey, maybe his name is Guy. You never know.) And for crying out loud, an older and not quite at his best Peyton Manning is still Peyton freaking Manning. He's one of the greats and always will be no matter how this season (or any other season he plays) ends.
For the first half of the season the media continued to question whether Peyton Manning still had "it" and whether or not Osweiler should be put in, despite the fact that the team started the season7-0. Now, granted, many of those wins wouldn't have been wins if it weren't for the defense, but still, at the end of the day, a win is a win.
Well, the Broncos' first loss of the season was delivered by the Colts (salt in Peyton's wound). The next loss against San Diego was even worse. After that game it came out that Manning had plantar fasciitis--to put it simply, a foot injury (I feel his pain, literally. Okay, so I literally feel my own pain, but can relate to his pain).
Despite the fact that it was quite clear that his sub-par playing was clearly a result of the injury, the media was again all over stories about how Manning's career might be over. What was worse was the fans. I made the mistake of checking out Twitter during games. Fans, loyal Broncos' fans were absolutely vicious. They just said mean, horrible, foul things. I wanted to get on there and remind people that Peyton Manning is a great player, that most of those people probably couldn't throw a football if their life depended on it, and that Peyton Manning is a human being and this crap might affect him. But I didn't, because arguing with people on social media is pretty much the equivalent of banging your head against a brick wall.
I've never been to a football game, but watching games on TV, I've noticed that when the home team is doing bad, the fans boo. Not just Broncos' fans, but most fans of any sport team. And they aren't booing the winners. They are booing THEIR HOME TEAM. It makes me so mad. Psychology, people! Being booed is not going to help a person's confidence! It's not going to help them win! It's only going to make them play worse! Have some freaking common sense! Have some compassion! (All right, I'm getting a little fired up.) Remember, these are not robots. These are people. They hear this. They maybe see these tweets (though if they're smart, I imagine they do their best to ignore most of it). This affects them. Support your team, whether they are doing bad or doing good.
I am sure that athletes have strategies and coping mechanisms for dealing with this sort of thing. Having listened to some of Manning's interviews, he handles the media beautifully. How the comments on social media actually affect his ego/confidence--I don't know.
I wish I could get some tips from some of these athletes. I know when the day comes when I'm published (and it will come, because I don't plan to stop until it does) that the negative reviews will come in. I've read negative reviews of books. People are cruel. I will no doubt get some ugly reviews and it frightens me. It will be one of those things where I shouldn't read them but probably will. There will be tears and anger and I will probably question whether or not I ever should've written that book in the first place. But I won't stop writing. Maybe I'll sit down with Peyton Manning and we can talk about how to deal with fan rejection.
Yeah right, but hey, you never know.
Back to that conversation I had with my boyfriend the other day about Peyton Manning going out in a blaze of glory. I said, "Even if the Broncos lose, why can't he? He made it to the big game!"
My boyfriend asked, "How many years back can you remember the teams who've lost the Super Bowl?" I thought about it, and I could only think of a couple.
I thought about it some more and realized: that isn't right. Making it to the Super Bowl is a huge accomplishment. The losers should be remembered.
I've been rejected 30 times. But you know what? I wrote a freaking novel. That's huge. Go me! I was brave enough to send it out. Go me! I was brave enough to continue to send it out even after being rejected again and again. Go me! When the rewrite is finished, and when my other two novels are finished, I'm going to send them out. They're going to be rejected several times before they're accepted. But I'm going to keep trying. Go me!
So . . .
Congratulations Seattle Seahawks 2014 NFC champions!
Congratulations Denver Broncos 2013 AFC champions!
Congratulations San Francisco 49ers 2012 NFC champions!
Congratulations New England Patriots 2011 AFC champions!
Congratulations Pittsburgh Steelers 2010 AFC champions!
Congratulations Indianapolis Colts 2009 AFC champions!
And congrats going all the way back to 1967, because if I list any more out you guys will probably get bored and stop reading.
I have a suggestion for the losers of tonight's game. You know how the winners always get gatorade dumped on them? You guys should go somewhere and get cucumber water dumped on you. Why? Because you should still celebrate. Sure, be sad. You lost. You should be sad. But you should also be happy and proud. You made it to the freaking Super Bowl. You won your freaking NFC or AFC championship. And cucumber water is a million times better than gatorade. Or, 7 times better.
1. It helps you age gracefully
2. Boosts bone health
3. Heals a hangover
4. Keeps cancer at bay
5. Helps you lose weight
6. Enhances healthy blood pressure
7. Supports supple skin (because what 200 pound football player doesn't need supple skin?)
Does gatorade do these things? No. Okay, sure these benefits come from drinking cucumber water, but I'm sure having it dumped on your head in a weird grieving/celebratory ritual still has benefits.
When my rejections start rolling in again, I'm going to celebrate with ice cream. When I get my acceptance, I'm going to have cucumber water dumped on my head. Why? Because it will remind me of what it took to get to my win. (And, any friends who are reading this, I expect you to hold me to the cucumber water thing.) Plus, gatorade is sticky.
Cucumber water: the stuff of losers and champions.
(Go Broncos!)
There were tears. There was yelling. There was irrational cussing and bashing of the publishing industry (none of which I actually meant, which is why I did it in the privacy of my home and not on the internet. I just needed to vent. Please, please, if you are upset over a rejection, call up a friend and vent. DO NOT get on twitter and bash the agent or traditional publishing. If you do, you're pretty much screwed.) There were pep talks. There was beer. There was wine. There was ice cream. There was chocolate. I think there may have even been chocolate wine. There were realizations: I need to make my query letter better and my book better.
I know that before any of my books get published my number of rejections will be far above 30. That number may even be in the three digits. I now know that this is quite normal for many writers. That's okay. I can handle it. Because being published is what I what more than anything (at least career-wise).
This morning I was thinking: if there's anyone out there other than fellow writers who understand rejection, it's athletes.
I tricked you guys, didn't I?
This post is not about surviving rejection from agents and publishers. It's about . . . wait for it . . .
. . . wait for it . . .
Football.
No! No, please! Loyal readers, don't go away! I'm sorry I tricked you! But it's Super Bowl Sunday! Come on! You had to at least have had some idea! The word gatorade is in the title! If you've ever caught a glimpse of a championship game you have to know about the gatorade! Please keep reading. I promise the above preamble wasn't 100% a trick. It's relevant to the post.
In actuality this isn't about football. While I am a fan, and do know a fair amount about the game, I don't feel that I know enough to write a post about statistics and strategy and all that. This post is about winning and losing and the vast difference with which players are treated on a weekly basis based on how well they're doing or not doing.
As a Colorado native I'm a pretty big Bronco fan. My nails are currently painted orange, blue, and white. I'm very excited that the Broncos are in the big game. My boyfriend is from--well, for simplicity's sake we'll say he's from Indiana, so while he's a Colts fan he is also a Peyton Manning fan. So, happily, we are rooting for the same team today. He said the other day, "I would love to see Peyton Manning win and go out in a blaze of glory." My stepdad (also a Bronco fan) said, "I would love for the Broncos to win, Manning to get a ring, and retire." I'm sure that many Broncos fans, and probably many Colts fans, have made similar statements.
The other day I said to my boyfriend, "Well, even if the Broncos lose, why shouldn't Manning get to go out in a blaze of glory?" The team made it to the Super Bowl for crying out loud. That's a huge accomplishment, especially considering the fact that the Broncos as a team, and Peyton Manning himself have had a freaking roller coaster of a season.
Let's talk about that roller coaster of a season. This is where the rejection I talked about earlier comes into this. For Peyton Manning and the Broncos, last season's playoffs didn't go so well. One and done. At that point, media and fans (egged on by the media) were going on and on about how Manning was old, he was done, he didn't have it anymore, he should retire, the team should put in Brock Osweiler, etc. etc. etc. Despite the fact that it had come out that Manning was injured during that game, the media didn't shut up about how he was too old to keep playing.
I was angry, to say the least. Now, as a fan, I of course want the team to win. But, I'm also a psychology student. Well, I have a Bachelor's degree and am not currently in school, but still consider myself a student because I love to keep learning stuff on my own. So, the psychology of sports fascinates me. There are so many different factors other than athleticism and how good the opponents are that can affect players: a previous win or loss, home field vs. away game, fan attitude, media attention, various things going on in a player's life, etc.
Other than a writer, a sports fan, and a psych student, guess what else I am? I'm a human being. Shocker, right? Well, I have another shocker. You guys might want to sit down for this. It's going to be tough to swallow.
Are you sitting?
If you have a friend or family member nearby, you might want to take their hand. I'm serious. This is going to be really hard. Maybe grab a stuffed animal or something.
Okay, are you guys ready?
Do you know who else is human?
Athletes.
I know, right? They're human beings. They have feelings. They have lives outside of the sports they play. Weird, right? They have families, friends, hobbies, and interests other than sports. They are affected (whether they admit it or not) by the media (maybe some more than others). Even the greats like Peyton Manning, Cam Newton, Tom Brady, and all the other greats whose names I don't feel like listing are human beings. I sometimes get the impression that fans forget this and think that guys like Tom Brady are robots who were built to play great football and do nothing else. (Although, I recently heard that Tom Brady has never in his life tried coffee, so that does call into question whether or not he is actually human.)
So, even when it was announced that Manning would be playing with the Broncos for the 2015 season, not all of the fans were happy. As a fan, I was angry with the media and my fellow Broncos' fans. I support the team, no matter who is playing. If it's Manning, okay. Go, Peyton! If it's Osweiler, okay. Go, Brock! It it's that third string guy whose name I don't know, okay. Go, guy! (Hey, maybe his name is Guy. You never know.) And for crying out loud, an older and not quite at his best Peyton Manning is still Peyton freaking Manning. He's one of the greats and always will be no matter how this season (or any other season he plays) ends.
For the first half of the season the media continued to question whether Peyton Manning still had "it" and whether or not Osweiler should be put in, despite the fact that the team started the season7-0. Now, granted, many of those wins wouldn't have been wins if it weren't for the defense, but still, at the end of the day, a win is a win.
Well, the Broncos' first loss of the season was delivered by the Colts (salt in Peyton's wound). The next loss against San Diego was even worse. After that game it came out that Manning had plantar fasciitis--to put it simply, a foot injury (I feel his pain, literally. Okay, so I literally feel my own pain, but can relate to his pain).
Despite the fact that it was quite clear that his sub-par playing was clearly a result of the injury, the media was again all over stories about how Manning's career might be over. What was worse was the fans. I made the mistake of checking out Twitter during games. Fans, loyal Broncos' fans were absolutely vicious. They just said mean, horrible, foul things. I wanted to get on there and remind people that Peyton Manning is a great player, that most of those people probably couldn't throw a football if their life depended on it, and that Peyton Manning is a human being and this crap might affect him. But I didn't, because arguing with people on social media is pretty much the equivalent of banging your head against a brick wall.
I've never been to a football game, but watching games on TV, I've noticed that when the home team is doing bad, the fans boo. Not just Broncos' fans, but most fans of any sport team. And they aren't booing the winners. They are booing THEIR HOME TEAM. It makes me so mad. Psychology, people! Being booed is not going to help a person's confidence! It's not going to help them win! It's only going to make them play worse! Have some freaking common sense! Have some compassion! (All right, I'm getting a little fired up.) Remember, these are not robots. These are people. They hear this. They maybe see these tweets (though if they're smart, I imagine they do their best to ignore most of it). This affects them. Support your team, whether they are doing bad or doing good.
I am sure that athletes have strategies and coping mechanisms for dealing with this sort of thing. Having listened to some of Manning's interviews, he handles the media beautifully. How the comments on social media actually affect his ego/confidence--I don't know.
I wish I could get some tips from some of these athletes. I know when the day comes when I'm published (and it will come, because I don't plan to stop until it does) that the negative reviews will come in. I've read negative reviews of books. People are cruel. I will no doubt get some ugly reviews and it frightens me. It will be one of those things where I shouldn't read them but probably will. There will be tears and anger and I will probably question whether or not I ever should've written that book in the first place. But I won't stop writing. Maybe I'll sit down with Peyton Manning and we can talk about how to deal with fan rejection.
Yeah right, but hey, you never know.
Back to that conversation I had with my boyfriend the other day about Peyton Manning going out in a blaze of glory. I said, "Even if the Broncos lose, why can't he? He made it to the big game!"
My boyfriend asked, "How many years back can you remember the teams who've lost the Super Bowl?" I thought about it, and I could only think of a couple.
I thought about it some more and realized: that isn't right. Making it to the Super Bowl is a huge accomplishment. The losers should be remembered.
I've been rejected 30 times. But you know what? I wrote a freaking novel. That's huge. Go me! I was brave enough to send it out. Go me! I was brave enough to continue to send it out even after being rejected again and again. Go me! When the rewrite is finished, and when my other two novels are finished, I'm going to send them out. They're going to be rejected several times before they're accepted. But I'm going to keep trying. Go me!
So . . .
Congratulations Seattle Seahawks 2014 NFC champions!
Congratulations Denver Broncos 2013 AFC champions!
Congratulations San Francisco 49ers 2012 NFC champions!
Congratulations New England Patriots 2011 AFC champions!
Congratulations Pittsburgh Steelers 2010 AFC champions!
Congratulations Indianapolis Colts 2009 AFC champions!
And congrats going all the way back to 1967, because if I list any more out you guys will probably get bored and stop reading.
I have a suggestion for the losers of tonight's game. You know how the winners always get gatorade dumped on them? You guys should go somewhere and get cucumber water dumped on you. Why? Because you should still celebrate. Sure, be sad. You lost. You should be sad. But you should also be happy and proud. You made it to the freaking Super Bowl. You won your freaking NFC or AFC championship. And cucumber water is a million times better than gatorade. Or, 7 times better.
1. It helps you age gracefully
2. Boosts bone health
3. Heals a hangover
4. Keeps cancer at bay
5. Helps you lose weight
6. Enhances healthy blood pressure
7. Supports supple skin (because what 200 pound football player doesn't need supple skin?)
Does gatorade do these things? No. Okay, sure these benefits come from drinking cucumber water, but I'm sure having it dumped on your head in a weird grieving/celebratory ritual still has benefits.
When my rejections start rolling in again, I'm going to celebrate with ice cream. When I get my acceptance, I'm going to have cucumber water dumped on my head. Why? Because it will remind me of what it took to get to my win. (And, any friends who are reading this, I expect you to hold me to the cucumber water thing.) Plus, gatorade is sticky.
Cucumber water: the stuff of losers and champions.
(Go Broncos!)
Sunday, January 31, 2016
The "Right" Way To Publish A Book--The Stars in the Sky and a Man Named Mordecai
Since the day I gave in to the writing bug I've been very much stuck on the idea of traditional publishing, i.e. finding an agent and getting in with a big publisher.
Why?
Honestly, I'm not sure.
I guess I just had it in my head that it was the best way, though I now know that is not true. There is no best way to publish a book. The world of publishing is changing, and I truly think it's a great thing. There are so many options out there for writer's today, and none of those options are necessarily right or wrong.
The "right" way to publish depends on the writer, the book they've written, the current market, what's trending, the position of the stars and the planets, and whether or not at the time an agent or publisher is reading your submission that somewhere in the world a cross dresser named Mordecai is currently dancing in the kitchen with a broomstick to the Divinyls song "I Touch Myself." Unfortunately, one cannot know for certain if a path is the right one until after they choose to take it. But, I suppose that is true about every aspect of life.
To reiterate my point that there is no right or wrong path in publishing I'm going to share some thoughts imparted to me by literary agent Sara Megibow of KT Literary. Sara lives in my state, so I've had the pleasure of meeting her twice. Once at a conference in November of 2014. I pitched my vampire novel (which at the time I thought was complete) to her. I am very shy and was ridiculously nervous. She is friendly, nice, and funny and instantly put me at ease and even got excited about my book. Yay! I sent her some sample chapters, but she later rejected my novel. However her rejection led me to realize that the book needed some revisions. Six months later I queried her again for the same novel (not all agents accept re-submissions. Before doing this it is a good idea to check their website to make sure of it.) She again requested sample chapters. Yay! Unfortunately, she politely rejected them again. I've since looked at my revisions and had a friend give it a good thorough shake-down (thanks Elly) and realized that it was far beyond ready. And I'm of course embarrassed that I sent it to roughly 30 agents and about 5 small publishers, and subjected Sara to it twice. But, after checking out many writer's blogs, I know I'm not alone. While I do wish that I'd been able to see that my story wasn't ready, I learned a lot from the experience and don't regret it. I'm currently rewriting my vampire novel (I might've mentioned this once or twice). When it's complete I think I will focus on small/niche publishing houses rather than searching for an agent. That is because I believe it is the best route for this particular story, not because I'm forever done with searching for agents. Absolutely not.
I met Sara again (though did not speak with her personally) at a presentation she gave in the summer of 2015 for the Northern Colorado Writers. This was a two hour talk about agents and what they do and don't do. Many people wonder why agents do not give feedback. The answer: it's not their job. They receive thousands of submissions and actually have very little time to read those submissions. If they gave everyone feedback, they would never have time to sell books to big publishers, work on dealing with rights, and all that other business-y stuff that doesn't sound nearly as fun as reading submissions. Sara's presentation focused mainly on the process of getting an agent and what one will do for you. She did however touch upon self-publishing and small publishing houses (many of these don't require agented submissions). She mentioned several times that none of these routes is right or wrong. She didn't even seem to be biased towards traditional publishing.
So, I take this as truth. Every writer needs to find the right path for themselves. I'm even going to take this further and say that it's not even about the right path for every writer, but the write path for a particular book. Now that I have three books (all with beginnings, middles, and ends--though none fully polished) I realize the truth of this. I think there is a different "right" path for each of my novels. Like I mentioned above, I think a small publishing house is the right path for my vampire novel, though if that doesn't work out I will probably eventually consider self-publishing. For my yet un-named mystery novel that I wrote for NaNo, I think it might be (so far, anyway) my best bet at the traditional route.
For my YA paranormal fantasy, Caribou Canyon, I've recently begun to think even further outside the three "main" routes of publishing. Caribou Canyon has three main characters, which in and of itself is a lot, but there are also a lot of important peripheral characters. As I was writing it, I wound up falling in love with just about every one of these peripheral characters. Needless to say, the story got away from me. Waaaaay away from. The handful of people who've read it are probably laughing, because you guys know just what an understatement that is.
The polished first draft is 250k words, and that's with the ending summarized, so it would probably be closer to 270k. And most of that is actual story. Some of it could be trimmed down, and some of it is over explaining, but for the most part, it's all usable story. What happened was I got caught up in the drama of all these characters who I loved so much.
To sum up, the main plot is about a small town with a ghost problem and a conspiracy. This was supposed to be the main focus of the story, with the drama of the three main characters only coming up every now and then. Well, that's not what happened. I loved the characters so much that the exact opposite happened. I even went off on the drama of the peripheral characters.
I've discussed many different solutions with my writer's group. The most obvious is to cut out most of the drama and zero back in on the ghost/conspiracy angle. If I want to keep my original vision of a stand-alone YA paranormal (and I really do want a stand-alone, because my vampire novel will be a trilogy and I don't want too many series' going at one time) this is what I should do. But I'm loving the characters and the drama of their lives. I'm really proud of what I've done with this story, and it's only a first draft. I think I've brought up some important issues and would actually like to expand upon them rather than trim them down. Can I do that in one normal length book? I've told my friends I can, but the truth is I'm probably being delusional.
Another solution is to give up on the stand-alone idea and make it a series. I'm not completely opposed to this idea, but it still isn't exactly where I'd like to go with the story. Part of the reason is because as far as the ghost/conspiracy aspect goes, I really can't think of how to split this into separate books with distinct arcs.
I've recently begun to think of another solution, one I can't take credit for. My friend Branden suggested that I publish it on a serial site. He explained that he thought it would fit really well in the serial format due to the many characters, their individual story lines, and the way I go off on chapter-long tangents that don't have a thing to do with the main plot.
Confession:
I (at times) tend to be a stubborn person. Because I've been stuck on the idea of traditional publishing for so long, and also stuck on the idea of Caribou Canyon being a stand-alone novel I pretty much let Branden talk while I sat there thinking "no way am I even considering serializing this story" (Sorry, Branden. It's nothing personal. Sometimes I get stubborn and can't see further than a foot in front of me).
Well, I've started to have second thoughts about the serial idea. I think Branden might be onto something. I've never read serial fiction, but thinking of TV shows I can see what he means. The best thing I can think to compare Caribou Canyon to is Pretty Little Liars, only with ghosts. (I'm thinking of Pretty Little Liars the TV show, not the books. I've never read the books.) I definitely need to research serial fiction and how it all works, but I'm starting to seriously consider it. The great thing about it is, if I chose that route Caribou Canyon is pretty much ready as is. Each chapter would need a bit of editing of course, but it wouldn't need a full rewrite. In the serial format I could keep it in all its 250k word glory. Heck, I could even add words (and yes, there are actually things I want to add). I'm very excited. So, thank you, Branden, for the idea. And if there's any one else from writer's group who had this idea I'm forgetting to give credit to, thank you. And thank all of you wonderful friends for reading all 250k (or even 100k of them) words. Not everyone would do that. That is a lot of words.
I think part of the reason why my stubbornness is letting up and I'm willing to look at other publishing methods is because I now have 3 stories under my belt. When I had only 1 baby it was really scary to think of trying anything other than the traditional route (which is irrational, considering that not all traditionally published books sell well). But now that I know my 1 book was not a fluke I think I'm willing to try things and I'm ready to get my feet wet and just see what happens. And while I'm doing that, I will be writing, writing, writing. Always.
If anyone has any thoughts or suggestions on the subject, or knows anything about serialized fiction, I'd love to hear it!
Why?
Honestly, I'm not sure.
I guess I just had it in my head that it was the best way, though I now know that is not true. There is no best way to publish a book. The world of publishing is changing, and I truly think it's a great thing. There are so many options out there for writer's today, and none of those options are necessarily right or wrong.
The "right" way to publish depends on the writer, the book they've written, the current market, what's trending, the position of the stars and the planets, and whether or not at the time an agent or publisher is reading your submission that somewhere in the world a cross dresser named Mordecai is currently dancing in the kitchen with a broomstick to the Divinyls song "I Touch Myself." Unfortunately, one cannot know for certain if a path is the right one until after they choose to take it. But, I suppose that is true about every aspect of life.
To reiterate my point that there is no right or wrong path in publishing I'm going to share some thoughts imparted to me by literary agent Sara Megibow of KT Literary. Sara lives in my state, so I've had the pleasure of meeting her twice. Once at a conference in November of 2014. I pitched my vampire novel (which at the time I thought was complete) to her. I am very shy and was ridiculously nervous. She is friendly, nice, and funny and instantly put me at ease and even got excited about my book. Yay! I sent her some sample chapters, but she later rejected my novel. However her rejection led me to realize that the book needed some revisions. Six months later I queried her again for the same novel (not all agents accept re-submissions. Before doing this it is a good idea to check their website to make sure of it.) She again requested sample chapters. Yay! Unfortunately, she politely rejected them again. I've since looked at my revisions and had a friend give it a good thorough shake-down (thanks Elly) and realized that it was far beyond ready. And I'm of course embarrassed that I sent it to roughly 30 agents and about 5 small publishers, and subjected Sara to it twice. But, after checking out many writer's blogs, I know I'm not alone. While I do wish that I'd been able to see that my story wasn't ready, I learned a lot from the experience and don't regret it. I'm currently rewriting my vampire novel (I might've mentioned this once or twice). When it's complete I think I will focus on small/niche publishing houses rather than searching for an agent. That is because I believe it is the best route for this particular story, not because I'm forever done with searching for agents. Absolutely not.
I met Sara again (though did not speak with her personally) at a presentation she gave in the summer of 2015 for the Northern Colorado Writers. This was a two hour talk about agents and what they do and don't do. Many people wonder why agents do not give feedback. The answer: it's not their job. They receive thousands of submissions and actually have very little time to read those submissions. If they gave everyone feedback, they would never have time to sell books to big publishers, work on dealing with rights, and all that other business-y stuff that doesn't sound nearly as fun as reading submissions. Sara's presentation focused mainly on the process of getting an agent and what one will do for you. She did however touch upon self-publishing and small publishing houses (many of these don't require agented submissions). She mentioned several times that none of these routes is right or wrong. She didn't even seem to be biased towards traditional publishing.
So, I take this as truth. Every writer needs to find the right path for themselves. I'm even going to take this further and say that it's not even about the right path for every writer, but the write path for a particular book. Now that I have three books (all with beginnings, middles, and ends--though none fully polished) I realize the truth of this. I think there is a different "right" path for each of my novels. Like I mentioned above, I think a small publishing house is the right path for my vampire novel, though if that doesn't work out I will probably eventually consider self-publishing. For my yet un-named mystery novel that I wrote for NaNo, I think it might be (so far, anyway) my best bet at the traditional route.
For my YA paranormal fantasy, Caribou Canyon, I've recently begun to think even further outside the three "main" routes of publishing. Caribou Canyon has three main characters, which in and of itself is a lot, but there are also a lot of important peripheral characters. As I was writing it, I wound up falling in love with just about every one of these peripheral characters. Needless to say, the story got away from me. Waaaaay away from. The handful of people who've read it are probably laughing, because you guys know just what an understatement that is.
The polished first draft is 250k words, and that's with the ending summarized, so it would probably be closer to 270k. And most of that is actual story. Some of it could be trimmed down, and some of it is over explaining, but for the most part, it's all usable story. What happened was I got caught up in the drama of all these characters who I loved so much.
To sum up, the main plot is about a small town with a ghost problem and a conspiracy. This was supposed to be the main focus of the story, with the drama of the three main characters only coming up every now and then. Well, that's not what happened. I loved the characters so much that the exact opposite happened. I even went off on the drama of the peripheral characters.
I've discussed many different solutions with my writer's group. The most obvious is to cut out most of the drama and zero back in on the ghost/conspiracy angle. If I want to keep my original vision of a stand-alone YA paranormal (and I really do want a stand-alone, because my vampire novel will be a trilogy and I don't want too many series' going at one time) this is what I should do. But I'm loving the characters and the drama of their lives. I'm really proud of what I've done with this story, and it's only a first draft. I think I've brought up some important issues and would actually like to expand upon them rather than trim them down. Can I do that in one normal length book? I've told my friends I can, but the truth is I'm probably being delusional.
Another solution is to give up on the stand-alone idea and make it a series. I'm not completely opposed to this idea, but it still isn't exactly where I'd like to go with the story. Part of the reason is because as far as the ghost/conspiracy aspect goes, I really can't think of how to split this into separate books with distinct arcs.
I've recently begun to think of another solution, one I can't take credit for. My friend Branden suggested that I publish it on a serial site. He explained that he thought it would fit really well in the serial format due to the many characters, their individual story lines, and the way I go off on chapter-long tangents that don't have a thing to do with the main plot.
Confession:
I (at times) tend to be a stubborn person. Because I've been stuck on the idea of traditional publishing for so long, and also stuck on the idea of Caribou Canyon being a stand-alone novel I pretty much let Branden talk while I sat there thinking "no way am I even considering serializing this story" (Sorry, Branden. It's nothing personal. Sometimes I get stubborn and can't see further than a foot in front of me).
Well, I've started to have second thoughts about the serial idea. I think Branden might be onto something. I've never read serial fiction, but thinking of TV shows I can see what he means. The best thing I can think to compare Caribou Canyon to is Pretty Little Liars, only with ghosts. (I'm thinking of Pretty Little Liars the TV show, not the books. I've never read the books.) I definitely need to research serial fiction and how it all works, but I'm starting to seriously consider it. The great thing about it is, if I chose that route Caribou Canyon is pretty much ready as is. Each chapter would need a bit of editing of course, but it wouldn't need a full rewrite. In the serial format I could keep it in all its 250k word glory. Heck, I could even add words (and yes, there are actually things I want to add). I'm very excited. So, thank you, Branden, for the idea. And if there's any one else from writer's group who had this idea I'm forgetting to give credit to, thank you. And thank all of you wonderful friends for reading all 250k (or even 100k of them) words. Not everyone would do that. That is a lot of words.
I think part of the reason why my stubbornness is letting up and I'm willing to look at other publishing methods is because I now have 3 stories under my belt. When I had only 1 baby it was really scary to think of trying anything other than the traditional route (which is irrational, considering that not all traditionally published books sell well). But now that I know my 1 book was not a fluke I think I'm willing to try things and I'm ready to get my feet wet and just see what happens. And while I'm doing that, I will be writing, writing, writing. Always.
If anyone has any thoughts or suggestions on the subject, or knows anything about serialized fiction, I'd love to hear it!
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